recently i was given advice

from 5th grade girls, on what else, how to attract girls. short and sweet:

step 1: "shave."
step 2: "buy some hip hop clothes."
step 3: "go to the club."

i don't know what's sadder,

a) that it's crystal clear to ten year olds, whose powers of deduction aren't fully developed, that i need help in that department, or

b) that rather than brush it off, i've been asking everyone what hip hop clothes are exactly, and more importantly, where i can get my hands on some.